Old Faithful

Just recently our landlord put in a new toilet. Our old toilet had a number of problems, the most pressing of which was its lack of being attached to the floor. When leaning one way or the other, say to get a magazine or some far off roll of toilet paper, the toilet would lean with you. I was always expecting it to just fall over one day letting all the waters within spread out over our apartment.

The other problem with the toilet is that the seat is attached with 2 bolts but only 1 loosely fitted nylon nut. So if you lean too far, not only does the toilet lean in the same direction, but the seat comes slightly off the rim of the toilet in an attempted to toss you pantless to the floor.

Recently the landlord came by to put in a new toilet. We figured we would be getting several good things out of the deal: A clean toilet, a well anchored toilet, and a new and very attached seat. We got the first two, but the third one eluded us. The same old seat with the same old nutless bolt came over to the new toilet.

Unfortunately our new clean toilet has a thinner rim which makes the seat even more susceptible to sliding off the edge. After a slight tweak of my back during a surprise seat shift, I went the hardware store and spent the $5 it took to get new bolts and nylon nuts. Now the seat stays put.

So I thought I had this thing beat until last night when I managed to clog the toilet. We have what is admittedly a really terrible plunger. It's one of those cheap ones with only a stick and a half-circle of rubber, as apposed to the fancy ones which have the half circle attached to the fitting that slides into the drain hole. Part of the issue with this plunger is that it tends to turn itself inside out after a particularly forceful plunge. The other problem is that the new toilet has a little groove near the back of the bowl that doesn't allow for a good seal. What it does allow for a is an impressive toilet geyser after every plunge. How's that for being stuck between a rock and a hard place? A strong plunge shoots water up out of the bowl and onto the floor, and a weak plunge won't move the clog. I spent an irritating couple of minutes solving one problem and creating another, namely that even though I didn't actually make the toilet overflow, I did managed to get quite a lot of water on the bathroom floor.

I guess it's time to invest in a top-quality plunger. A plunger for life.