Totally Week You Guys

What a terrible week. There's the relationship thing, and then there's the work thing. Since I already explained the relationship thing, in this post I'll explain how and why I started and ended a job this week.

My first issue was with some computers I built. I feel comfortable saying that I'm pretty good with computers. I guess the four computers I was working with weren't comfortable with me saying that. They hated me and refused to cooperate. When I finally got them to (mostly) cooperate, I had to move each computer to several different locations, set it up, shut it down, and move it again. I wonder if I was on candid camera.

My next issue was the boss-employee relations. The boss is aggressive, intimidating, and very matter of fact. He makes me feel uncomfortable, unintelligent, and his constant indoor smoking gives me a headache. He likes to give job assignments like cleaning up the desk when the desk is covered with his personal paperwork. I don't know where any of that stuff goes.

Then there was the lamp. I hate this lamp. It's cursed, or maybe I'm cursed. It's this fluorescent desk lamp with a magnifying glass in the middle. It didn't turn on when he set me to fixing it, and it doesn't turn on now that it's my last day. There are only so many pieces in a lamp, and I replaced and/or tested all of them. It just refuses to function. But apparently it's not going in trash because the boss once pulled a steel splinter out of somebody's eye with it. He’s sentimental.

The final straw was the alarm. Today I went to lunch, and when I got back I was to continue painting my desk white. On my way to lunch, boss man said that we would be out getting some stuff, and that I was to unlock the door and turn off the alarm with the code: 45 45 45. So when I came back from lunch, I opened the door, and typed in 45 45 45. Keeps beeping. 45 45 45. Still beeping. Why isn't it stopping? 45! 45! 45! Now the siren is going off. Sirens are LOUD. PAINFULLY LOUD! 45454545454545!!!! Cancel. Motion off. None of these buttons do anything! So I sat in my car, outside and away from the siren, until the landlord came by, and tried to turn off the alarm. He couldn't do it either. So I sat in my car some more, until the boss came back, and told me the code was 45 45. He punches in the code. Nothing happens. Again, nothing happens. So he rips the siren off the wall. Ah, why did I think of that? Why wouldn't it turn off when he typed in the right code? Why did he tell me an extra 45?

Most importantly, why did all this happen this week? I wonder if my arm will fall off or my car will explode tomorrow. I think this week needs a capper. Maybe I'll get a steel splinter in my eye.