I Hate the Answering Service

I'm on call this weekend. If somebody has a mattress emergency, I'm it. And because all the regular customer service people have weekends off, we have a medical answering service answer our 1-800 number. Unfortunately they are idiots.

So far I've gotten 3 pages this weekend. I shall list the problems with each:

Page 1:

-There was no address. If I'm going to go fix a problem, I'm going to need to know where the problem lives.

Page 2:

-Again, no address, but they did include a city: N'Vado. N'Vado isn't a real city. Novato, however, is.
-The phone number they gave me was for Pacifica Pizza. I'm pretty sure they weren't calling me about beeping pumps.
-The message said that the problem was with an Airmax. Nope, I don't know what an Airmax is either.

Page 3:

-This page was about a broken zipper on a product in Compton. I'm not very near Compton. The rental techs who work in Compton are very close to Compton. I tried to call the answering service to explain their mistake but I was put on hold for 10 minutes.

I swear anyone who calls my company after 5pm or on the weekend thinks hard about whether or not they want to ever order anything from us again.